detox#1

i finally grew out of my cowardly lion costume and started fresh once again yesterday. it went pretty well i gotta say, but i still have a lot i want to improve on and the scary part is i know its only gunna get harder..

yesterday}

intake;

-lots of green tea

-lots of agua

-fruit(baggie moma packed me=few pieces of pineapple, few pieces of strawberries)(eaten @ around 7ish during my break at work, probably good because i started feeling a lil dizzy..it almost felt good)

-large veggie juice from work two hours later when i got off(beats, celery, carrots an a few lemon slices)

outtake;

-being at work for 5 hours(its a work out at times=carrying heavy plates, alwaysss standing up/walking and talking, moving chairs, tables)

clean;

-one grit i bummed of maddy, and only cus she had the best - camel lights(for some reason no one else smokes em anymore - although idk how we all got started on smoking in the first place?? its kinda ridiculous how like nine of my close friends smoke... ehhh i need to remind myself its really not worth it at alllll, its teh same concept of eating something that tastes good --> the immediate satisfaction lasts momentarily while youre refusing to acknowledge the fact you could be putting your health in danger for a much longer amount of time - a period of time that youll probably spend kicking yourself in wonderment of how the impulsive desire couldve possibly been so strong to have crippled your will power and self-disciplin;hell, even jus common knowledge and the smallest fraction of solid intelligence that overrides manipulating media)

-->8 overall an amazing day health-wise. i made sure to be dedicated to the loyalty i deserve to give myself in reaching this goal and achieving what i know im capable of. not only the inner beauty that will be illustrated on the outside through this self disciplin, but also the confidence it will give me in order to be granted some of the things ive been wishing and hoping so long for - finally.. i cant waitttt! its going to be tough, i know this. last night laying in bed i couldnt fall asleep for a long time, probably partly from all the green tea, but probably partly also cus i was so hungry. i could feel my tummy aching for fuel and feel it begin to eat away at itself.. yesterday was an admittedly hard day that seriously lacked in protein and other necessary nutrition, but i think it was necessary to get this jumpstart back into my healthy way of living. in the future, i will add soy protein, whole grains, tofu, etc to my diet in addition to a balance of yoga and cardio in order to maintain stability without starving myself to a regretful place of binging and purging(weve all been there before..). but for now i am training my mind body and soul how to react and think before acting like a reflexive robot. everytime i know i shouldnt do something but eventually give in has been brought to an abrupt hault and transfered to a new track that will prove more satisfying :) im tired of compromising my goals and dreams for the attraction of momentary pleasure and the insignificant fulfillment of spontaneous temptations. i will eventually lose all my neglected potential that i have to apply my determination in a good way if i dont utilize it before it melts away in disappointment.

today}

intake;

-nada thus far(knock on wood!i have faith in myself i dooo)

outtake;

-jus school today and now i have a bunch of studying and homework i really need to do so i don think ill make it to the gym..once again =/ maybe ill go in late, 9ish, if i finish all my work? as long as i remember schools more important.. besides, its true that i need some time to shed these pounds from valentines/depressed/loathing in self-pity weekend and last week haha. cus i don wanna work out and build on top of the fat to then be discouraged by not getting promising resluts.. i knwo that sounds silly but its jus something in my head that i feel messes with the whole detox process.

clean;

-one grit with whitty laying on top of her car at the santa monica mountains rest area near potrero.. it was so worth it though, im sorry. the sun and breeze felt so good on top of that car with the mountains looking greener than ever. at least ive finally agreed that rain does have positive effects besides teh negative effect of sending me into depression haha. but really, im jus teasing, im glad the rain feeds our soil and nurtures mother earth with its organic nutrients to then be offered up to me in sacrifice of the natural cycle :) i already feel 3x better after having self control for jus two days, and 5x better after being sober(minus the grits/minus that one day of buddha on the hike..so worth it/minus the one day of having a couple drinks -->if you knew me, youd know this is saying a lot for 60 days..haha but its good for me i can tell. and i think its important to my relationships concerning particular friends and family. at least for a little while for sure.) and not to mention feeling 10x better after being a vegetarian for 6 months haha :) 

call it an awakening or enlightenment of self improvement, call it whatever you want. but ultimately returning to my instinctive basic needs and using my most valuable(although rare and progressively becoming extinct psh) raw materials in all they offer my mind body and soul. without the disgusting manipulation of man's endurance-turned-greed of the polluting manufacturing factories, compromising over processing manipulation, and chemical infested so-called-food, i can ditch the addictive lifestyle of habitual eating that The Man works so hard to advertise in hopes for $$, ultimately leaving consumers' health as a last priority. phooey.

{rant fin}

as if thats not reason enough for changing my lifestyle, i got plenty more valid evidence to back up my thesis for all those visual learners ;)

...update for yesterdays detox#2

intake;

-some bites of spinach salad(i made for fam)

-some fish(way good, but still plain and healthy)

outtake;

naaaada meh

clean;

-one grit ugh

-->8 pretty good, but try to keep it more balanced and active?